"Ry, I have a feeling I'm about to get pulled over..."

....turns out I was right. Twenty seconds later, the siren and lights went on. I slowly pulled over and into a K-Mart parking lot. Down went my window and here goes:


Officer: "Good Evening. Do you know why I pulled you over?"

Stormy: "No sir, not really."

Officer: "Well you swerved back there into the bike lane, and well, it's the holidays, I want to make sure that you're not driving under the influence or talking on your cell phone."

Stormy: "No officer, it was neither, I sneezed." (I refrained from mentioning that I was holding my legs together to avoid pee-ing my pants. Considering I had to pee like a Russian race horse and the baby feels like it's literally sitting on my bladder!)

Officer: "Oh, okay. That makes perfect sense. How about you give me your driver's license, registration, and insurance information."

Stormy: "Sure, no problem. Sweetheart can you help me find the insurance card and registration?"

Officer: "I'll be back and you can keep looking."

(about 5 minutes later)

Officer: "Were you able to find that information?"

Stormy: "Well, we found an expired insurance card and registration from Utah, we're still working on it."

Officer: "Okay, then. I can check to see if your insurance was renewed. Be right back."

(another 5 minutes later)

Stormy: "We found the Oregon registration!"

Officer: "Thank you ma'm. Well everything checks out just fine. I'm not going to give you a warning or ticket, I simply wanted to make sure you weren't driving under the influence."

Stormy: "Officer, rest assured we weren't driving under the influence, in fact, my husband and I have never drank an ounce of alcohol in our lives."

Officer: "WHAT?!??!?!?!"

Stormy: "Nope."

Officer: "Wow. That's amazing."

Stormy: "You know what else, officer? This past July marked the 10th anniversary since I received a traffic ticket...AND I was only 5 months from my 10th anniversary of not being pulled over!"

Officer: "Well, that's wonderful. I'm glad you're driving safely. All I have to suggest is that you go home and prepare a "traffic stop packet" in the chance you get pulled over, this way, you'll be more prepared."

Stormy: "Absolutely, Officer, will do!"

(about 4 minutes later)

We finally finished cleaning off the dash which was covered with the glove compartment contents.